No More Excuses

I have learned to love running. Running keeps my head straight and for the first 5 weeks of my time here I didn´t do it. I allways had an excuse... It´s too cold, there is snow on the ground.. this morning a little girl woke me up at 7.30am and I wasn´t too happy about it, cause it was my day off. But then I tought how could I turn this in to a positive thing and I decided to go running and it was so rewarding and just what I needed. I want to learn to do that with other things too. Turn the negative unexpected things into something positive.

I also have loads of excuses for not doing other stuff. They usually involve not being good enough and you are not the person who could do this or that. Lately I have been thinking why not me why do I have this picture of myself in my head that I could not  do something. Then I made a list of all the negative things in my head that had been said to me that were making me doubt my capability of doing things. After this I made a list of things that were encouraging. Things that had been said to me that made me feel good about my self. As I compared these two lists I noticed that the good things were the opposites of the bad things. So I had heard the exact opposite thing against my bad thing and still in my head it was the negative thing that had stuck. Why do I hear the negative things louder than the positive things? Why would the negative things be any more truthful than the positive things?

After this I crossed out all the negative things and left the good things and said to my self that you have to start hearing the positive things too. Don´t make yourself less than you are. If you want to run, go run! If you want to be a writer or a dancer or what ever don´t let the negative things in your head stop you. Don´t feel satisfied being just as you are if you want to be something more. Just because someone has told you that you are week it does not mean you should feel sorry for your self and just say it´s okey that I don´t go for example running cause I have gone trough so much in the past. No! No more excuses!

-Ariela

The Beginning

My journey started on the 9th of February early in the morning. It feels like an eternity ago, but in reality its only been 2 weeks. First week went by really fast in NYC. I got to know a lot of new people and the days were long. All this new stuff everywhere, new people, new language... I think I couldn´t even process most of the things that were told and seen in NYC. But I did have fun and I know that I want to go back during my year here at the states.

 

Suddenly it was time to leave NYC and fly to my new home here in Nantucket. The plane ride from Boston to Nantucket was a strange but nice experience. The plane was so small it only fit 6 people. It was kind of scary but also very exciting in a good way. The first thing I noticed on the island was that all the houses looked the same. Now that I have been here a little over a week I don't think that's the case anymore. On the first week of my job I learned to do the drop off and pickup for school and now I know how to get around a little better.

 

I have also seen the ocean now and it was so beautiful. I can´t wait for summer. The sound of the ocean made me so calm and it made me feel like everything will be just fine.

 

Yesterday we went to see a movie called two days and one night. It was about this woman who was fighting to keep Her job after being diagnosed with depression. It got me thinking how all this change in my life so quickly could affect me badly. I have to be a better me for my sake. The woman in the movie felt some of the same things I have been feeling during my short time here. It kind of opened my eyes to the possibilities of my own actions. And how my own actions could shape my year here. "I have to make my own destiny." so to speak. I know that sounds like a cliché but that's what has been on my mind now.

 

That's what I have to say for now

- Ariela